Anushka & Varun's Story: How an Ivy League Grad Found Lasting Love
Anushka & Varun
This is the wonderful journey of Anushka & Varun — told in Anushka's own words — a story that proves even the most accomplished, methodical planners need a different playbook when it comes to love. Anushka heard about Smart Dating Academy when Bela was interviewed on another podcast, and after two Ivy League degrees and a great job, she knew she needed a new plan to find love, since what she was doing wasn't working.
If you want to listen to the whole podcast episode, click HERE
The Beginning…
A little background on me — I have always been an overachiever, and most of my life I've been on a 'track' towards what I thought was a 'successful' life. From the time I was a kid, my plan was to go to an Ivy League school, get a competitive job, get married at 27, and have 2 kids by the time I was 32. I also had the ideal guy in mind: he'd be handsome, athletic, smarter than me, good with my family, and have a ton of friends. However, as I got older, the school and job part were checked off my list, but the marriage and kids timeline started to worry me. I was a 'late bloomer' who never had a serious relationship until I was 25 — before that, I had never been asked out on a date.
After my first serious relationship, where I met my ex at business school, I was 27, and it took me a while to get over it. I moved to Boston and had all the elements I wanted in life — my dream job, an amazing group of friends, an incredible apartment — except for a relationship. So I started online dating, but found it extremely discouraging. I spent about 2.5 years on the apps, making what I thought was a meaningful effort, with no success. At a certain point, I even asked my parents to help me find someone. They set me up on several disastrous dates.
Finally, I turned 30 and was really starting to lose hope. I started following various fitness influencers, one of whom had a podcast with a couple of episodes on dating and relationships — Bela was the special guest, and that's how I learned about SDA. I reached out right away and started working with Bela and Lindsay. Starting with the in-person meeting in Chicago and the photo shoot, they helped me realize that my 'ideal man' needed to be thrown out the window — I was looking for all the wrong things. What I loved was that they made dating formulaic. They gave me a playbook: spend 30 minutes a day on the apps, aim for 1–2 dates per week, don't spend more than 90 minutes on a first date, screen out specific red flags, always go on a second date unless there are red flags. Following their rules, I immediately got way more dates in my first month than I had in the prior 3 years combined.
And then…
From there, we built a regular cadence. I was still keeping up my dating pipeline, but the more time I spent with Varun, the more I liked him. After a couple more first dates elsewhere that went terribly, I became sure I didn't want to date anyone else, and I asked him to be exclusive. Then the pandemic hit in mid-March 2020, and we ended up spending more and more time together. It could have been a make-or-break moment — but it had the opposite effect. We met each other's parents in April/May 2020, moved in together in September 2020, got engaged in February 2021, and got married that June. I never imagined that in three years I'd be married to a man who couldn't be more perfect for me.
The best love ever…
He makes me feel loved unconditionally for who I am. He's a true partner who balances me out and helps me become a better friend, daughter, and partner. I am so glad I worked with Smart Dating Academy, and I can't recommend it enough. If you're on the fence, do it.