TCW - The Perfect Online Profile

Follow these 7 tips to get a full inbox of responses

As a dating coach/owner of Smart Dating Academy, I get asked daily, “Do guys really read online profiles?” My response: “Yes, they absolutely do!”

Women are often shocked by this answer. As I mentioned in my previous blog, great online dating profile photosare the most crucial step in capturing men’s attention. Believe it or not,well-written, memorable online profiles that can make a man smile are a close second. Think of your profile as your personal advertisement in cyberspace, differentiating you from the millions of other women on the site. You are going to be compared to everyone else, so make sure it’s fun and interesting in order to capture his interest. If you follow the tips below, and invest time in it, you’ll be off to a great start.

1. Use a theme.

Pick five key attributes about yourself that you want to highlight – the things about you that are best and most important. If you need help, get feedback from your friends/family. Keep these five “adjectives” in mind when reading the next tips.

2. Show, don’t tell.

Tell unique, original stories about yourself to show off the attributes above. Don’t just say I’m kind, smart and loving.” (As a rule, no lists online – that’s what makes your profile sound generic.) Or use boring clichés like, “I’m just as comfortable in jeans as in a ball gown.” Instead, be specific. “I’m the one who will make you my grandma’s secret chicken soup from scratch when you get the flu.” Rather than describing yourself as adventurous and spontaneous, tell a story. “When I was parasailing in the Caribbean, my rope got severed, and I went plummeting several hundred feet towards a giant coral reef. Made it down fine, after I recovered from the shock, I went back up for the ride I deserved!”

3. Display your warm, positive side.

Most men are looking for fun, nice, smart girls with a warm side – a “soft place to land” after work. Make sure you show your softer side – with things that are authentic (of course) and put you in your best light. “I’m the cool aunt who takes my three nephews and nieces to Six Flags for a day of roller coasters, junk food and winning stuffed animals.” Showing your warm side humanizes you and adds that je ne sais quoi to your profile. On the flip side, we recommend not talking too much about work or the demands of your job. All of that can come out later – when he knows and likes you!

4. No negativity or baggage.

Don’t talk about your dog with cancer, divorces or make statements like this, “If you’re just looking to hook up – please delete my profile” or “If you don’t at least have a Green Card, please don’t write to me.” Statements like these can really put a bad taste in the reader’s mouth.

5. Be concise.

At any given time, there are 20-40 million singles dating online, and you want your profile to keep his interest! Your profile isn’t the place to tell your life story (that will come later). Be vivid with your examples, but keep them to 1-2 sentence stories. We recommend a profile that is no longer than 400 words total, including the “About Me” and “About My Partner” sections.

6. Spell and grammar check, please!

We live in a texting, smart-phoning world, where it is very common to see gross language mistakes/abbreviations. You want to attract the right kinds of men, and spelling/grammar errors, or saying “gr8!” instead of “Great!” will give off a very different impression.

7. Pick a great username and headline.

This is valuable real estate in a profile, and so often thrown away. ChiTownGirl: not so interesting. Think about your attributes above, and come up with an interesting name that goes with your theme. For example, if you’re a great cook and a nurse, you could be “ZagatRatedNurse.” And your headline could be, “Can perform instant triage in the kitchen.”

So, dip your quill in some ink, and get writing. Follow these tips, and you’ll be hearing from many suitors – and soon.

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