Find more fish in the sea of online dating
What was once a frontier for a few daring dating pioneers, online dating has expanded exponentially over the last decade, becoming one of the most common ways for people to meet potential love interests!
And now that the once small pool of online daters has become a vast sea full of millions of available men, why are so many women still standing at the shore with the same tiny net?
One of the reasons is because the online search system makes it so easy. Want someone rich? Click the box. Want tall? Click the box. Want to match with a particular religion, profession, or ethnicity? Just click the box. And while these search criteria can make you feel like you are molding the perfect mate, Weird Science-style, the truth is you could be screening out a plethora of potential mates.
For example, let’s say you're looking for someone who is at least 6’, works in the business field, has an advanced degree and loves art, but instead you get an email from someone who is 5’9”, is an artist, has no advanced degrees, but loves art. Doesn’t sound appealing to you? What if I told you the emailer was Johnny Depp? If he were online, that is exactly what his profile would look like!
The truth is, compatibility usually has nothing to do with who matches on paper and everything to do with chemistry, matching values and life goals. And think about your dating past - we give people many more chances in real life than we do online. So, why not widen your net, get more dates and increase your chances for finding someone with the right GHQ (Good Husband Qualities) by reconsidering these common traits:
1. Height – Cut your self down to size. Did you know that the majority of female online daters want someone over 6' yet only 12 percent of the male population is over 6’? Try shorter! When Katherine Hepburn met Spencer Tracy, she said, “Well, you’re much shorter than I expected.” He replied, “Don’t worry, I’ll cut you down to size!” By the way, Jon Stewart, Matt Damon and Brad Pitt are all under 6’.
2. Income – Don’t judge a book by the cover. We all know the economy is not so great. Furthermore, there are several ceiling caps on income that are beyond our control. And someone who makes only $50,000 a year, never married, has no children and manages his money well is vastly more appealing than someone w
ho makes $150,000-plus, pays alimony and child support for three kids, and who is in over his head after buying that red Porsche and bachelor pad at Trump Tower during his midlife crisis.
3. Age – It's just a number. Does he really have to be only 5 years older than you? Why not 6, 7 or even 10? Someone who takes really good care of themselves is often in better shape and looks better than someone much younger.
4. Education – Overrated? There are many people who chose to eschew an education in pursuit of a business venture, a career in a trade or for artistic endeavors. Bill Gates? Mark Zuckerberg? I rest my case.
5. Ethnicity – It’s a small world after all. We think we have our types but sometimes we should step outside of our comfort zones. For example, I had a 5’6” German client who widened his online net and is now engaged to a 5’2” Haitian professor. When they met in person, it was an instant click.
6. Religion - Faith can be deceiving. Some people who were raised with religion do not follow the religion of their childhood. Some are candid about this in their online profiles and some are not. If it is really important to someone, they usually will say so. Otherwise, don’t rule someone out because they practice a different faith until you find out if they require that their mate share the same faith.
So off to your boats, ladies and casts those nets wide for the perfect catch!
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Sun, November 6, 2011
by Bela Gandhi filed under